My son started college this fall, and my daughter began her first year of high school. My son is spreading his wings, not spending as much time around the house. My daughter likes to remind me her dad and grandpa are an eighty-percent influence on her life. That only leaves twenty-percent, and if you factor in grandmas, I’m sure my contribution is much lower than that.
This coming from the adorable blonde girl who lived in my womb for nine months and was attached to my breast for almost two years (yeah, I was THAT mom)! Oh, how I long for the days when my babies gazed into my eyes adoringly (after all, “Mother is the name for God on the lips and hearts of all children,” as Eric Draven reminds us in The Crow).
Somehow my post-menopausal brain decided a puppy would be the answer to all my problems! A puppy would love and adore me!
God has a funny way of letting you forget the pain involved with infants and puppies and only let’s you recall the sweet smells and soft cheeks of those little bundles of joy. Soon I was on the internet, just window shopping, I swear. I found a pretty little girl with a “lilac” coat (purple is my favorite color after all). I showed the picture to my husband then left to go shopping with my daughter. While I was gone, hubby contacted the breeder, and after a flurry of emails and sending off a deposit, my husband and I drove across the state that weekend to pick up our new bundle of joy.
I named my new baby girl Willow, and she snuggled me the entire way home in the car. Such a sweet little thing! UNTIL- the sleep deprivation, the poop cleaning, the teething, the property destruction, the put-out siblings….oh yeah, I remember NOW. Just like the last puppy we had, just like my two babies, the memories all came flooding back. See, that’s the trick. It’s the way the good memories make us feel that we’re addicted to, which blinds us to all the bad memories. If that didn’t happen, I’m pretty sure reproduction would grind to a halt and our species would become extinct!
Although Willow is in her “piranha” phase, she still reveres me as her supreme Alpha Dog, something my children no longer acknowledge. Hopefully one day they’ll look at me again with those adoring eyes, but for now I’ll settle on knowing I’ll always be Willow’s top dog.